By Pastor Adam Sinnett

From Sept 21st thru Nov 30th, 2008 Mars Hill Church studied the Song of Songs (aka Song of Solomon). The series, called The Peasant Princess, addressed important, albeit controversial, issues pertaining to gender, marriage, relationships, dating and sex. You can listen and watch previous sermons in this series, among many others, at westseattle.marshillchurch.org under “Media”. You can also follow this link to read questions and answers on Christian Sex (mature content warning) that Pastor Mark addressed on the Mars Hill Church blog.

The purpose of this series of posts was to answer questions posed by those attending West Seattle that Pastor Mark was unable to get to. These are some remaining questions that were asked.

Q: “What’s your opinion about sexual intimacy (marital, of course) on the Sabbath? Is there any spiritual reason to feel uncomfortable with being intimate on the Sabbath?”

A: The law has been fulfilled and our Sabbath rest is now in Jesus Christ (Mt 5:17; 12:8; Luke 6:5) It is perfectly appropriate to be sexually intimate with your wife on the Sabbath.

Q: “How does one balance the need to be beautiful with this reality – people starve for lack of food and my pedicure money could save a life?”

A: How we spend the money God has given us to steward calls for wisdom and discernment. It can be helpful to prioritize the relationships in your life (Jesus, spouse, children, family, others) to provide a guide in decision-making. (Mt 22:37-40; 1 Tim 5:8; Eph 5:22-33) What is of preeminent importance is making note of what is controlling, guiding and motivating your heart as you make such decisions. (1 Cor 10:31)

Q: “What are your thoughts on cosmetic plastic surgery?”

A: Pastor Mark has answered a similar question here.

Q: “Other than Song of Songs, what are good scriptures for couples to study and grow in their relationship in Christ and each other?”

A: Honestly, any time you spend in scripture and prayer with your spouse will help grow the two of you together whether you decide to study a particular section of scripture together (Ephesians 5:22-33 would be a great place to start), focus on a book (such as one of the gospels), read through the Bible in a designated amount of time or simply share what you are individually learning during your Bible times.

Pastor Mark recommends many books (outside the Bible) here that you may also find helpful.

Q: “As adult women living in community are we accountable to each other for where we spend our nights?”

A: This would fall under the category of loving your sisters in Christ and seeking their safety and welfare. (Mt 7:12; John 13:34-35) It would be best to come to a mutual understanding with your roommates on what this practically looks like so that everyone is on the same page.

Q: “My wife has done things in her past (like oral sex) that she won’t do in our marriage (maybe due to shame?). How do I properly love her through this.”

A: I answered a similar question in the Peasant Princess Follow-Up #6 under, “My wife says that oral sex makes her feel like a prostitute. What are some ways I can serve her and help her gain a redeemed view of this?” You can find that here.

Q: “Is anal sex a sin? What about sex on your period?”

A: Pastor Mark answered these questions here (anal sex) and here (cycle).

Q: “What, if any, are the qualifications for a good marriage counselor? What are obvious disqualifications? Thanks!”

A: The three most important qualifications are that they love Jesus (Mt 22:37), use and apply the Bible (2 Tim 3:16; Heb 4:12), and have a good track record within marriage (i.e. “practice what they preach”; James 1:22-25).

Q: “In these days with sex so open how can we prepare our kids to have a biblical life through teen years?”

A: Pastor Mark answered a similar question here. It begins while they’re still little, but it’s never too late.

For more questions and answers from the Song of Songs series, check out:

Pastor Adam’s Full Follow Up Q&A List

Sermon and Q&A Session Audio/Video

Pastor Mark’s Q&A on MHC Blog